I find myself always longing for Spring. Spring signifies change, warmer weather, happier vibes, and a downhill slope to the end of the year.  The fact that I hate Winter and being cold means that Spring is even more special to me.

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The last year and a bit has been anything but easy.  My father passed away just over a week ago, and coping with that loss is possibly the hardest thing I’ve had to do.  He was sick for a long time with Stage Four Pancreatic Cancer and despite being given 6 months to live, we got to spend 14 months with him. The last few months were particularly stressful and heartbreaking, and it’s incredible how grief can affect and overwhelm you.  But, perhaps that is a post for another day – I still feel very shocked and numb about it all.

I would like to take a moment, however, to thank everyone for being such wonderful people.  I have been absolutely overwhelmed by the love I’ve received.  I’ve discovered that I have some truly incredible and selfless people in my life.  Thank you to all of you for every single message of condolence, for checking up on us, for bringing us food (yum), and for simply taking care of us during this difficult time.  My closest friends bought me such an amazing gift – thank you Lani, Jen, Stef, Sarah and Audz (why aren’t you on twitter?!).  The quote that came with this gift was beautiful and brought a tear to my eye..

There is a sacredness in tears… They are not a mark of weakness, but of power.  They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues.  They are messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition and of unspeakable love. – Washington Irving

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For some reason, this day, the 1st of September, the first day of Spring, signifies a lot to me.  At times that I felt I was drowning in sadness and pain, I just thought that all I need to do is get to Spring. Somehow, if I could get to Spring I’d be ‘OK’ – because, let’s face it, everything is easier in Spring.

So, it has arrived.  Things can only get better from here.  Things will never be the same, but I’m looking forward to what the rest of the year has in store for me.  I have exciting things coming up, I can feel it. I’ve learnt that I’m stronger than I thought, and that life can throw a lot at me – and it won’t be able to break me down.

So happy Spring friends!  Plant a tree!

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